It isn't pollution that's harming the environment. It's the impurities in our air and water that are doing it.

I believe we are on an irreversible trend toward more freedom and democracy - but that could change.

The Holocaust was an obscene period in our nation's history. I mean in this century's history. But we all lived in this century. I didn't live in this century.

This election is about who's going to be the next President of the United States!

One word sums up probably the responsibility of any vice president, and that one word is `to be prepared'.

If we do not succeed, then we run the risk of failure.

Let me just tell you how thrilling it really is, and how, what a challenge it is, because in 1988 the question is whether we're going forward to tomorrow or whether we're going to go past to the -- to the back!

What a waste it is to lose one's mind. Or not to have a mind is being very wasteful. How true that is.

Take a breath, Al... Inhale. -- Vice President Dan Quayle politely cutting off Senator Al Gore during the VP Debate in Atlanta, 10/13/92. Gov. Zell Miller of Georgia said that Dan Quayle reminded him of one of his grandkids when they've had too much sugar.

Republicans understand the importance of bondage between a mother and child.

Hawaii has always been a very pivotal role in the Pacific. It is in the Pacific. It is a part of the United States that is an island that is right here.

Welcome to President Bush, Mrs. Bush, and my fellow astronauts. -- Vice President Dan Quayle addressing the 20th anniversary celebration of the moon landing, 7/20/89 (reported in Esquire, 8/92)

Mars is essentially in the same orbit... Mars is somewhat the same distance from the Sun, which is very important. We have seen pictures where there are canals, we believe, and water. If there is water, that means there is oxygen. If oxygen, that means we can breathe.

The loss of life will be irreplaceable. -- Vice President Dan Quayle after the San Francisco earthquake, 10/19/89 (reported in Esquire, 8/92)

Bobby Knight told me this: ``There is nothing that a good defense cannot beat a better offense.'' In other words a good offense wins. -- Senator Dan Quayle, in a speech to the City Club of Chicago, comparing the offensive capabilities of the Warsaw Pact with the defensive system of NATO, 9/8/88 (reported in Esquire, 8/92)

I was a less than serious student in college. If I had to do it over again, I would be far more serious. I did play a lot of golf. But I don't think that's any reflection on my ability to lead this nation.

Looking back, I should have pursued philosophy and economics and things of that sort in college more, but I didn't.

I didn't pay a lot of attention as I should have in college.

[At the Quayle house, civil rights and the environment] weren't things that we discussed a lot at the dinner table.

She was attracted to me by my intellectual curiosity. (about Marilyn)

I've never professed to be anything but an average student. (Sen. Dan Quayle at the VP debate in Omaha)

Life has been very good to me. I never had to worry about where I was going to go. But I do say, "Dan, you know, sometime in life there's going to be a tragedy." There was never anything where "I've got to work really hard to get there..."

I'll have to check with my dad. (responding when an Indiana GOP county chairman asked him to run for Congress)

I know one committee I don't want--Judiciary. They are going to be dealing with all those issues like abortion, bussing, voting rights, prayers. I'm not interested in those issues and I want to stay as far away from them as I can. (from "What a Waste it Is to Lose One's Mind"--the Unaughtorized Autobiography)

Next are the (quite frequent) spelling errors of Dan Quayle

May our nation continue to be the beakon of hope to the world. (The Quayles' 1989 Christmas card)

Sam, had a great time this weekend but the golf was lousey. (on lousy golf games)

This next one's what he's most famous for:

Add one little bit on the end...Think of 'potatoe,' how's it spelled? You're right phonetically, but what else...? There ya go...all right! (correcting a student's correct spelling of 'potato' during a spelling bee)

I should have caught the mistake on that spelling bee card. But as Mark Twain once said, "You should never trust a man who has only one way to spell a word." (actually, Danny, you're quoting former Pres. Andrew Jackson.)

I should have remembered that was Andrew Jackson who said that, since he got his nickname "Stonewall" by vetoing bills passed by Congress. (sorry, again, but Andrew Jackson and Confederate General Thomas J. "Stonewall" Jackson, who got his name at the first Battle of Bull Run, are not one in the same.)

This next group is a bunch of Quayle quotes titles Dan Quayle --> Not Quite There

My friends, no matter how rough the road may be, we can and we will never, never surrender to what is right.

Okay, I won't open it until then. (After having been presented with an empty box that was to contain a gift from a sailing team in S.America. He was told that the gift was not ready yet, but that it would be presented to him when they arrived in the US.)

I happen to be a Republican president--ah, the vice president.

Maybe you guys will get lucky this year and face the Orioles in the World Series. (encouraging the Milwaukee Brewers after throwing out the opening pitch of the season. Both teams are in the American League)

Are they taking DDT? (asking doctors at a Manhattan AIDS clinic about their treatments of choice)

A low voter turnout is an indication of fewer people going to the polls.

I just don't believe in the basic concept that someone should make their whole career in public service. (-Vice Pres, former senator, former congressman, etc...)

This isn't a man who is leaving with his head between his legs. (VP discussing John Sununu's resignations and apparent lack of flexibility)

Unfortunately, the people of Louisiana are not racists. (regarding David Duke's candidacy)

We lead in exporting jobs. (committing a Freudian slip while speaking to the Chamber of Commerce of Evansville, Indiana, a city which lost 4 large companies in the last four years...quickly changed the word jobs to products.)

You can't just walk into a store and buy a gun. There's all sorts of registration, there are all sorts of state laws. (after criticizing Michael Dukakis for the Massachusetts furlough program..was later informed that in many states a person can just walk into a store and buy a gun.)

If you give a person a fish, they'll fish for a day. But if you train a person to fish, they'll fish for a lifetime.

I'm glad you asked me that. This gives me the perfect opportunity to talk about the problems with this Congress... (responding to reporters' questions about his use of Air Force 2 to go on golf trips at the cost of \$26,000/hour)

We're capable of mistakes, but I do not care to enlighten you on the mistakes we may or may not have made.

I've been told to keep my remarks relatively brief. I understand Quayle hunting season begins at noon.

The next section is titled Huh?

It's rural America. It's where I came from. We always refer to ourselves as real America. Rural America, real America, real, real, America.

Let me tell you something. As we were walking around in the store, Marilyn and I were just really impressed by all the novelties and the different types of little things that you could get for Christmas. And all the people that would help you, they were dressed up in things that said 'I believe in Santa Claus.' And the only thing that I could think is that I believe in George Bush.

You all look like happy campers to me. Happy campers you are, happy campers you have been, and, as far as I am concerned, happy campers you will always be.

It's a good Supreme Court. They're lawyers...they're judges...they're appointed for life.

We will move forward, we will move upward, and yes, we will move onward.

I've heard people say that [I have a short attention span]. I don't feel I do, because when I'm interested in something I'll stay in focus as long as it is necessary...If you get off on something I'm not very interested in, it's very easy for me to block it out. It's easy for me to block things out.

I was known as the chief grave robber of my state.

The next group of Quayle quotes go by the name Plans for the Future

Doing it the right way is not to speculate about returning in four years or what not. All right, folks. Sine die. (when asked if he plans to be back in power some day...borrowing the Latin expression that Congress uses when it adjourns with no fixed date of return.)

I'm not interested in running for governor or any other public office. If I ever run for public office again, it will be for president.

You'll have to ask her that. (when asked if 'a Quayle' might run for governor of Indiana)

Who's going to beat me? (confidently predicting his chances at the 96 presidential race)

Verbosity leads to unclear, inarticulate things."

We don't want to go back to tomorrow, we want to go forward.

I have made good judgments in the past. I have made good judgments in the future.

The future will be better tomorrow.

We're going to have the best educated American people in the world."

People that are really very weird can get into sensitive positions and have a tremendous impact on history.

I stand by all the misstatements that I've made.

We have a firm commitment to NATO, we are a part of NATO. We have a firm commitment to Europe. We are a part of Europe.

I am not part of the problem. I am a Republican.

When I have been asked during these last weeks who caused the riots and the killing in L.A., my answer has been direct and simple: Who is to blame for the riots? The rioters are to blame. Who is to blame for the killings? The killers are to blame.

Illegitimacy is something we should talk about in terms of not having it.

Murphy Brown is doing better than I am. At least she knows she still has a job next year.

We are ready for any unforeseen event that may or may not occur.

For NASA, space is still a high priority.

Quite frankly, teachers are the only profession that teach our children.

The American people would not want to know of any misquotes that Dan Quayle may or may not make.

[It's] time for the human race to enter the solar system.

Public speaking is very easy.